We can and will do anything to ease your mind, comfort your tired soul and ensure the well-being of your body and our bank account. We cannot guarantee eternal bliss, but we can guarantee five minutes of heaven on earth. Wishes? Dreams? Problems? Regrets? Desires both ordinary and insegrievious? SCAM solves all.
Please contact us at any time to arrange membership. Accolytes, priests, high priests and other rankings are available for a small surcharge above the usual membership dues. Priestly vestments are custom made to meet YOUR particular needs.
We have no physical church as we believe you can worship anywhere, provided that place has previously been annointed with holy water ($4.95 per beaker [2 oz] plus applicable shipping and handling charges. Order 6 or more and s/h is included)
We accept donations through Paypal, although cash is also accepted as are plates of hot latkes and bottles of cold champagne.
Thank you for your support.
And remember, with SCAM all things are possible.
Special consideration given to repentent pond scum.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Saturday, March 15, 2008
more of what we do...
we also can write on:
philosophy
psychology
politics
para psychology
pissants and psycophants (you know who you are)
parenthetical situations
parades
parenting
pulkes
pudendas
parrots
photography
priestly rites and rituals
punims
puns
psychobabble
pseudo science
pots and pans
pantaloons
pantomime
pottery
poultry
pandemics
pot pouri
and most any other P that you can think of. but we can't all P at the same time.
but that's how we make holy water, gene!
philosophy
psychology
politics
para psychology
pissants and psycophants (you know who you are)
parenthetical situations
parades
parenting
pulkes
pudendas
parrots
photography
priestly rites and rituals
punims
puns
psychobabble
pseudo science
pots and pans
pantaloons
pantomime
pottery
poultry
pandemics
pot pouri
and most any other P that you can think of. but we can't all P at the same time.
but that's how we make holy water, gene!
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
these are a few of our favorite things
these are a few of the things we will do...
personal
relationship
business
school papers
tutoring
general papers
revenge letters
dear john
dear jane
i quit letters
love letters
proposal letters
friendship letters
porno letters
you chose the topic letters
(yes it seems redundent. your point is?)
each request will be individually priced based on our enjoyment, amount of creativity involved, our boredom threshold, research required and length of letter/essay/paper.
so. if we like it (really HOT 'fuck me letter', minutiae of the tax code, barometric indcators and their relation to the current value of the euro) we charge less. seems fair to us.
personal
relationship
business
school papers
tutoring
general papers
revenge letters
dear john
dear jane
i quit letters
love letters
proposal letters
friendship letters
porno letters
you chose the topic letters
(yes it seems redundent. your point is?)
each request will be individually priced based on our enjoyment, amount of creativity involved, our boredom threshold, research required and length of letter/essay/paper.
so. if we like it (really HOT 'fuck me letter', minutiae of the tax code, barometric indcators and their relation to the current value of the euro) we charge less. seems fair to us.
Monday, March 10, 2008
why we are here...
just SOME of the things we are and do:
we are full service word whores. anything that requires the written word from term papers,
NO WE DON"T THAT"S WRONG. OKAY, IF THE MONEY IS RIGHT WE WILL
dissertations, notes of solace, revenge, job applications, book reports, love letters etc.
we do it all! and we do a great job too
want to write a dear john/jane? want to get laid?
we are your word whores.
you want it we do it.
for a price of course.
each whoring assignment is unique and only for you.
letters are not replicated to others.
your individual satisfaction is our job and our joy.
OMG OMG OMG OMG we love our work
we like satisfied customers and they come over and over again
yeppers. pass the tissues
back to us. and yes, we know exactly what we are.
we are the word whores of the internet and proud of it.
by gene, comments in purple by robyn
we are full service word whores. anything that requires the written word from term papers,
NO WE DON"T THAT"S WRONG. OKAY, IF THE MONEY IS RIGHT WE WILL
dissertations, notes of solace, revenge, job applications, book reports, love letters etc.
we do it all! and we do a great job too
want to write a dear john/jane? want to get laid?
we are your word whores.
you want it we do it.
for a price of course.
each whoring assignment is unique and only for you.
letters are not replicated to others.
your individual satisfaction is our job and our joy.
OMG OMG OMG OMG we love our work
we like satisfied customers and they come over and over again
yeppers. pass the tissues
back to us. and yes, we know exactly what we are.
we are the word whores of the internet and proud of it.
by gene, comments in purple by robyn
SACRED CHURCH OF THE ANCIENT MYSTERIES
Word Whores is the official voice of the Sacred Church of the Ancient Mysteries, a non-denominational all inclusive church [501(c)(3) status pending] which meets all needs and solves all problems. We can and will do anything to ease your mind, comfort your tired soul and ensure the well-being of your body and our bank account. We cannot guarantee eternal bliss, but we can guarantee five minutes of heaven on earth. Wishes? Dreams? Problems? Regrets? Desires both ordinary and insegrievious? SCAM solves all.
Please contact us at any time to arrange membership. Accolytes, priests, high priests and other rankings are available for a small surcharge above the usual membership dues. Priestly vestments are custom made to meet YOUR particular needs.
We have no physical church as we believe you can worship anywhere, provided that place has previously been annointed with holy water ($4.95 per beaker [2 oz] plus applicable shipping and handling charges. Order 6 or more and s/h is included)
We accept donations through Paypal, although cash is also accepted as are plates of hot latkes and bottles of cold champagne.
Thank you for your support.
And remember, with SCAM all things are possible.
Special consideration given to repentent pond scum.
Please contact us at any time to arrange membership. Accolytes, priests, high priests and other rankings are available for a small surcharge above the usual membership dues. Priestly vestments are custom made to meet YOUR particular needs.
We have no physical church as we believe you can worship anywhere, provided that place has previously been annointed with holy water ($4.95 per beaker [2 oz] plus applicable shipping and handling charges. Order 6 or more and s/h is included)
We accept donations through Paypal, although cash is also accepted as are plates of hot latkes and bottles of cold champagne.
Thank you for your support.
And remember, with SCAM all things are possible.
Special consideration given to repentent pond scum.
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